Give and Take

We live in a "Gimmie" (give me) society- take all you can.  Get all you can."  Gimmie. Gimmie. Gimmie...

It seems like everyone is trying to "get" something or "take" something. Not many are actually trying to give anything these days. Ironically, the only area that I don't really see this evident is in the subject of advice.  OMG!  Everyone wants to GIVE their advice. However, the sentiment is not the same for TAKING advice. Most people are quick to stomp the breaks when you try to tell them anything.  My motto has always been, "If you haven't built a house, don't tell me how to build mine."  Simply, don't tell me how to do something that you have NEVER done.

Now, don't get me wrong, there's great merit in good, sound, Godly advice, but most times, people want to tell you what they would do in your shoes, and they have NEVER been in those shoes. You may have stiletto situations and their giving tennis shoe solutions. We must be conscience of the fact that some that you  will advise, will do EXACTLY as you say.  So be careful in the advice you give.  And, like it or not.... We shouldn't give advice if we aren't able to take it.  

Some of our closest friends and relatives are good at giving their 2 cents.  The only problem is they need change back.  (I crack myself up.) Sometimes when I think about them, I think…..Seriously, how do YOU tell someone how to raise their kids, discipline their kids, dress their kids, and how to handle their marital issues or finances, etc. … when  sweet darling your kids are a mess. Your marriage is on life support and your finances are…. DOA. (Dead on Arrival).   I know… it may be harsh, but it’s true.  Not only that, as much as they love to give advice, they need to look at their own situations, take their own advice and apply these techniques.  Surely… they do need it.  (It’s hard- but somebody had to say it. Why not me?)

I’m not saying that all advice is to no avail, I am saying and I believe three things:

(1) Be in a position to give advice. If you aren’t doing or haven’t done it … You don’t qualify to give advice in that matter.

 (2) Don’t ask for advice if you can’t take it.  If you are a defensive person who lives by excuses, save yourself and others the trouble. Don’t ask. Evidently you can’t handle the truth.  

 (3) Make sure your advice is tried, true and most importantly, that it can be supported and found in the Word of God.  No matter what the issue…. It’s in the bible.

If Advice is only as good as the giver and taker, one has to give good advice and the other has to heed good advice.  So….give and take with caution.   Enjoy the read, take heed and if the CROWN fits... then WEAR IT! 

Proverbs 12:15 (KJV)

The way of a fool is right in his own eyes: but he that hearkeneth unto counsel is wise.

Proverbs 1:5 (KJV)
A wise man will hear, and will increase learning; and a man of understanding shall attain unto wise counsels. 

Be Yourself!

Be yourself.  If God wanted you otherwise, He would have created you otherwise. 
Be yourself.  Everyone else is taken.
Be yourself. Because an original is worth more than a copy.

Be yourself!  Why are those two words such a challenge to today's society?  It would seem that being yourself would be a whole lot easier than trying to be something that you're not.  Sadly, these days there is an enormous amount of folks trying to look like, be like and act like someone or something they clearly are NOT!  Why?  Are we not satisfied with who we are?  Do we think that we are substandard to others?  Is it because the life of others is that appealing, that good, and that desirable!?  What is it?

While shopping last night, I was absolutely disturbed at seeing a young man, who clearly was desperately trying to be someone/something he is not- was not-and will never be!  It’s impossible!   I’ve always told my girls, “When people know they are not something and try immensely hard to be that in which they are not, they actually make it obvious that they are not! “ So, it was with the gentleman I saw last night. In the words of my daughter, “He was doin’ too much!”  

 It’s not that we are bad people.  It’s not that we don’t know who we are… we just sometimes choose to “try” to be someone else. We can all identify with that, because surely, at some point we have attempted to dress like, talk like, act like, sound like someone.  Really, you say you haven’t?  Come on! Everybody, tried the Michael Jackson moonwalk! Or the Beyoncé song and dance.  The Michael Jordan dunk!  Or the Emmit Smith- touchdown!   We've tried some dance, song, voice, or style......So there!

It takes great courage to NOT conform to this world; peer pressure doesn’t only invade the lives of kids. It's time we take a stand.  Be thankful and grateful in the way God made us. He does great work!  You are an original! You are wonderful!  You are marvelous!

Pull off the mask and be who you are!  Be what God called you to be!  Today is the first day of the rest of your life.   Make a Vow.  Take a Stand.  Be yourself!  No one can do it better than you!  Enjoy the read, take heed and if the CROWN fits... then WEAR IT! 

Psalm 139:14 (KJV) I will praise thee; for I am fearfully and wonderfully made: marvelous are thy works; and that my soul knoweth right well.

What time is it?

The one thing that has been consistently the same since the beginning of time.... is TIME. 

My husband was watching an immaterial movie the other day, and I wasn't much interested until I heard, "anything lost can be retained except for wasted time."  That statement was powerful!  Impactful!  Thought provoking!  But, seriously.... it's nothing new!


There has been 24 hours in the day, since the beginning of time. No more.  No less. We have always known that we cannot turn back the hands of time.  So much so, that someone even wrote a song about it,  "If I could turn back the hands of time."   Yet, we continue to waste time as if it will be replenished or recovered.  We behave as if time is a glass of tea and we receive unlimited free refills! (I made that up! Corny, but true.)  I am appalled at how we get upset and go days, months, and years not speaking to our family, when we all have an expiration date on our lives.


In the last few years my family has grieved the loss of my father and then soon after my grandfather. This morning I received a call from a close friend with news that her Father had passed.   Death is always a season of reflection and sometimes even regret of not saying or doing something before the loss of our loved one.  During these times of bereavement, we sometimes are guilty of making empty promises to get closer and love on each other more, etc.  And most times, they are just that, EMPTY!  After some time, most of us go back to the same ‘ole same ‘ole.


What time is it?  It's time for us to GROW up!  and GET OVER it! We cannot control what others do, but we do control how we react to it.  If you have wronged someone, apologize.  If someone has wronged you, forgive.  The past, is just that, the past!  Again I say..Grow up and Get over it!  The time is coming where the second hand will cease and our life clock will stop ticking.  So, while we are still here, make the best use of our time. Live each day as if it is your last, it just may be.  Love hard!  Love unconditionally! Say it. Show it. Live it. Mean it.


Each of us will get to the end of our life journey. When we do, we will not reflect on how many conference calls we joined, miles we ran, bills we paid, or how much is in our 401K, but we will reflect on the love we gave, the love we received and the love we remember.  Take Time to love today!  Enjoy the read, take heed and if the CROWN fits... then WEAR IT! 

Ecclesiastes 3:1 (KJV) To everything there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven. 

Truth is...

We are often unprepared for Truth, which is why Truth is revealed to us progressively. Truthfully, one of the hardest things to do...young or old, is to accept the truth.  To a baby; you're not going to be held all the time; Toddler; you're not going to watch TV all the time, Youth; You are not going to play all the time, Teen; You are not going to talk/text all the time; Young Adult; you're not going to shop all the time, and Mature Adult; you are not going to stay young forever!  It's a difficult reality.  But, it is the truth.

So many times in relationships; romantic or otherwise, we see signs of  truths, people tell us the truth, sometimes we already known the truth in our heart, yet we refuse to accept, because of fear, pride, guilt, selfishness or superficiality.  Years (sometimes not that long) later we learn the hard lesson of friends vs. acquaintances.  We find ourselves in uncompromising situations, dysfunctional families, unfulfilled marriages, abusive relationships, alone, or worse...miserable and bitter!  If we be honest with ourselves, many times we fib when we spit the words of "If I knew then what I know now."  We do know and sometimes we've known all the time. We just don't and won't admit to it and respond accordingly.  It's not easy but, it is the truth.  I challenge you. Make a decision today, face the truth, uncover the truth, admit the truth, tell the truth, accept the truth and be FREE!

This is my very first blog!  And I wanted to start.. with the truth!  Truth is I have made a lot of mistakes in my life.   Bad decisions, immature decisions, reactive decisions.. the list goes on. But, now, that I am getting wiser, I believe that none of those were "mistakes," if I learned from them. (Bad choices- not mistakes)  The intent of this blog is for me to awaken the truth within myself and share. Prayerfully, it will help someone along the way. And even better, I hear it's therapeutic!  So, I promise to tell the truth and nothing but the truth, so help me God!  Enjoy the reads, take heed and if the CROWN fits... then WEAR IT! 

 

John 8:32 (KJV) And ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free.